If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it!)
If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that’s more like it!)
A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (In my next life I want to be a pig!)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Still not over that pig thing!)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. Is that why Flipper was always smiling? (Why isn’t the pig included in this list?)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmm…..)
A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of…?) (Did the gov’t pay for this research??)
Polar bears are left handed. (Who knew….?,Who cares!)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It’s like a human jumping the length of a football field.
A cockroach will live nine days without it’s head, before it starves to death.
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male’s head off. (“Honey, I’m home. What the….”)
Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (In my next life I still want to be a pig… quality over quantity!)
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Oh, jeez!)
Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.
An ostrich’s eye is bigger than it’s brain. (I know some people like that.)
Starfish don’t have brains. (I know some people like that too!)
Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown. BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and smack the jerk upside the head.
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