20. Can’t stick their heads out of Windows Vista.
19. Fetch command not available on all platforms.
18. Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.
17. Too difficult to “mark” every website they visit.
16. Can’t help attacking the screen when they hear “You’ve Got Mail.”
15. Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating.
14. Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they’re browsing www.pethouse.com instead of working.
13. Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG Frisbee.
12. Not at all fooled by Chuck wagon Screen Saver.
11. Still trying to come up with an “emoticon” that signifies tail-wagging.
10. Oh, but they WILL… with the introduction of the Microsoft Opposable Thumb.
Dog Typing
9. Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome
8. ‘Cause dogs aren’t GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand…
7. Barking in next cubical keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software.
6. SmellU-SmellMe(tm) still in beta test.
5. SIT and STAY were hard enough, GREP and AWK are out of the question!
4. Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to maneuver.
3. Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.master’s.leg.
2. Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.
and the Number 1 Reason Dogs Don’t Use Computers…
1 eoiokxoidfpi vivimfjui uoelnm reoorgjnv8 o9orrenn Translation: It’s mighty tough to type with paws:).
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