Joke- Dig It Up For The Tomatoes Plot
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Once a old Italian man lived alone in the country. He wished to dig his Tomato garden but it was very tough work be cause the ground was hard. He have a son Michele who can help him out but unfortunately he was in prison. One day the old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament in such way,
“Dear Michele - I am feeling very sad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. Now I am getting too old and lazy to be digging up a garden plot. I wish If you were here, my all worries would be over. And I know you would dig the garden for me. Love, Papa.”
Then after a few days he received a letter from his son Michele and he replied in such way,
“Dear Papa - I really love you and I would do anything for you , except dig up that garden. That was the plot where I buried the bodies. Love, Vinnie.”
In the very next morning at 4 AM, FBI and local police both arrived to the old man house and they dug up the whole plot but found no body. But by digging up the whole land converted into a fertile land, they apologized to the old man and left. The same day the old man again received another letter from his son Michele. Now he wrote,
“Dear Papa - Now go ahead and plant the tomatoes. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances. Love, Vinnie.”
How to Fix a Rude Parrot - Funny Joke
Max received a parrot for his birthday.
The parrot was fully-grown with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren’t expletives were, to say the least very rude.
Jerry tried hard to change the bird’s attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of to try and set a good example. Nothing worked.
He yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back. He shook the bird and the bird just got angrier and became even more rude. Finally in a moment of desperation. Jerry put the parrot in the FREEZER.
For a few moments he heard the bird squawk and kick and scream. Then suddenly, there was a…..
Annoying Kid In The Bus
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Yelling Kid
Once a little kid gets into the bus and sat down exact behind the driver seat. When the bus moves the kid starts yelling “if my dad was a bull and my mom was a cow I would be a little bull.”
The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid who was continously noising with “if my dad was an elephant and my mom was a female elephant would be a little elephant ”
The kid goes on with many animal names and finally the bus driver gets angry on the kid and says “What if your dad was a drunk and your mom was a prostitute?!”
The kid smiles and says “i would be a bus driver!“
Be strong, honey, I love you, too.
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A man escapes from a prison where he had been kept for 15 years.
As he runs away, he finds a house and breaks into it, looking for money and guns, but only finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him up in a chair. While tying the girl up to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her on the neck, then gets up, and goes to the bathroom.
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